E.D.

I read my horoscope today and it said I should do something to shock the world. So, in the interest of seeing if abiding by my horoscope actually amounts to a hill of beans in this crazy world, I'm going to try it. Today I'm going to talk about erectile dysfunction.

Actually, I'm going to talk about the erectile dysfunction ads that were airing during the Super Bowl. After the unfortunate "wardrobe malfunction" (don't you love what quote marks can do a sentence?), men shrugged their shoulders at Janet's boobage and complained about the ED ads instead. You heard the kvetching.

"Junior asked me to explain what ED is. What do I say?" To the men of America, I saw 'grow up.' I remember Tampax ads, douches, and bloating. I'm thinking ED is God's way of saying, "Men, you've just had it too easy. I didn't raise you to be a bunch of whiners."

I'm waiting to hear fathers all across America sit down with Junior and explain that ED is NOT the end of all manhood as we know it.

Anyway, that's my shock for today.

Kathleen's Current Events:

• Whole Foods Market opens in Columbus Circle. New Yorkers are shocked, shocked to see vegetables in their natural state.


• A focus group for people who access the Internet over dial-up. Sorry, it just cracks me up.


• Worst.Sex.Ever at P.S. 122. Be there, but go in disguise, just in case you actually uh, know somebody there.

KO